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Diego Costly-Coffee is a striker who plays for Atlético Mineiro He used to play for Badzil but caused controversy by switching to Max Spayne.


He has an ugly and scary face and big ears. He has a lot of chesthair. He wears an apron with his name and squad number on it.

He speaks in a unintelligible way and he is not so much intelligent. Because of his unintelligible speech, he has an own translator called Diegoogle Translate. He is very aggresive and likes to fight other players, sometimes his own team mates or his coach.

Name origin

His name is a pun of his surname Costa with Costa Coffee and the Costly is a reference at how he is well-paid.

His other name Diaggro Costa is because of his aggressive manners.


Jose Moaninho

Diego taunting Moaninho.

Moaninho was happy to have signed Diego to Chelsea for Premier League 2014/15 season. He proved he was right because Chelsea won the title that season. Moaninho asked Diego who had won the league during his wnning league bus tour.

However, in the season after, when Chelsea was having a bad season, Diego got angry with Moaninho and started to get in fights, even throwing his bib at Moaninho.

After Moaninho went to Moneychester United, Diego was still angry with him. He went to mock Moaninho when Chelsea was at top of the league during Christmas and also chased Moaninho in the New Year's resolutions video.

Hairtransplantonio Conte

Conte and Diego arguing.

Conte and Diego had tense interactions due to Diego's manners. When Conte signed other strikers, Diego punched and beat them and Conte because he wanted to be the main striker.

In one match, Diego asked for a sub but Conte couldn't understand him. Terry then went and brought a caveman to translate Diego's speech, which Conte refused. The caveman brought another message from Diego, which was a middle finger draw on a stone.

Diego and Conte had another issue when Diego didn't want to train with the team so he went training alone and was conspiracing moving to a Chinese club.

Conte eventually moved Diego off Chelsea after a few other issues. Some conspiracy theories were that Diego was sleeping with Terry's wife, Diego injured Eden Hazardous so he wouldn't move to Real Getrid and that Diego insulted Conte during a "Guess Who!" game with Pedro and Willian.

Secs Fabregash

Secs Fabregash as Diego's translator.

Secs translated Diego's speech in the final of the League Cup.

Pedro and Willian

The trio playing "Guess Who!".

Pedro and Diego had a few issues, but still stayed friends. When Diego failed a pass to Pedro against Tottenham, Diego blamed Pedro and hold his throat.

They eventually got fine with that and they played "Guess Who!" with Willian.

Eden Hazardous

Diego Costa laughing after injuring Eden Hazardous.

Diego stamps on Hazardous' foot after Hazardous told him that he would move to Real Getrid if he passed the medicals. Diego did it because he diddn't that Hazard leave.


  • It's hinted thay he would like to fight Joey Barton, another player known for his aggressiveness.
  • He has two parodies related to real life companies: Diego Costly-Coffee (Costa Coffee) and Diegoogle Translate (Google Translate).
  • Before having his own translator, Secs Fabregash used to translate his language during his interviews.
    • In one match, Terry brought a caveman to translate Diego's speech to Conte
    • He maybe based off Leatherface from Texas Chainsaw Massacre