Champions League 15/16 The Cartoon

Cartoon

Matchday 1 Tuesday

Manchester Sheiky F.C. 1-2 Old Lady

POB : Yes!

POB : What? I was offside?

Refere : No. I'm just disallowing it because you've got stupid hair.

Vinjury Kompany : Giddy-up horsey!

Giorgio Chiellini : Mamma mia!

Old Lady (character) : Leave it to me!

Old Lady (character) : Ciao... Would you hold this a moment, bambino!

Joe Hairt : Of course I will!

Unwell Paleandgreeni : Hey, little lady!

Old Lady (character) : Yes?

Unwell Paleandgreeni : Fancy a drink?

Unwell Paleandgreeni : You can't kill what won't die.

Real Madrith 4-0 Shakahisloptar

Cristiano Arrogantaldo : The first rule of Hat-trick Club is...

Cristiano Arrogantaldo : ...you have to have scored a hat-trick for your club.

Andre Shirley : ...or country!

Cristiano Arrogantaldo : God damn it. give me chance to finish my sentence.

Cristiano Arrogantaldo : Or country.

Cristiano Arrogantaldo : Oh...just me tonight.

Cristiano Arrogantaldo : This old man, he scores three...

Cristiano Arrogantaldo : Another match ball came home with me!

Cristiano Arrogantaldo : Tuuuuu more records!

Lionel Messigician : Tuuuuu more penalties!

Cristiano Arrogantaldo : You haven't scored a hat-trick so get out please.

Lionel Messigician : Oh you're such a doucebag!

Cristiano Arrogantaldo : What?!

Lionel Messigician : Nothing!

Cristiano Arrogantaldo : Little sh*t

Paris Saint Zlatan 2-0 FFS Malmo

Zlatan Egohimovic : Zlatan and the Masters of the Europverse

Skeletor Cavani : Pass the ball to me. you muscley boob.

Commentator : Skeletor Cavani scores!

Skeletor Cavani : FOOLED YOU!

Zlatan Egohimovic : We're on the same team!

Zlatan Egohimovic : In today's story we learnt that sometimes... ...it's better to work with your enemies, not against them.

Angel Devil Di Maria : We also learnt that sometimes... ...it's

b... ...better to walk out on your enemy. Louis, fffff.f.f....f....f....f*ck you

Matchday 1 Wendsday

Chelsea Bus Company 4-0 Mashabbi Tel Aviv

Commentator : It's Hazardous with the penalty...

Jose the Special Mong : Eden is better than Cristiano Arrogantaldo...

Cristiano Arrogantaldo : Good luck! Show me how it's done!

Eden Hazardous : Calm down, Eden. Just stare at the keeper like you normally do and slot it home.

Commentator : Oh dear.

Cristiano Arrogantaldo : Eden, we've had a problem!

Commentator : Oh, and Olivier GQ is off.

Olivier GQ : I'm too sexy to die!

Mesut Eyezil Terrestrial : Oh! WE'RE GOING DOWN!!

Commentator : Oh, Arsene'll have crashed in Zagrzeb!

Ass Roamer 1-1 Bancelona

Commentator : Florenzi shoots...oh, what a howler!

Commentator : But wait, oh, the Eden penalty has landed.

Olimpiakos 0-3 Bayern Munchausen

Commentator : Thomasshole Muller shoots!

Commentator : Oh, he's having a laugh with that shot!

Commentator : Eden Hazardous scores!

Commentator : What a goal!

Valancedere 2-3 Avengers St Petersburg

Commentator : Hulk lines one up.

Hulk : HULK...SMASH!!!

Commentator : Oh, and Hazardous bags the unlikeliest of hat-tricks!

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